I recently gave a talk to an Adult Children of Alcoholics group. It was a very lovely group and Im so glad I did. I happened to pick the topic of Emotional Sobriety and is often the case, I learned a lot while researching for this topic. The obvious things of course about emotional sobriety are that it involves the ability to self-soothe and regulate emotions.
Now you’re probably thinking “Easier said than done!”…right? That’s what I thought. Then I realized that the ability to regulate emotions requires one very important ingredient: A functional adult self on board.
For many people who are children of dysfunctional families (which involves alcoholic, mentally ill and/or narcissistic parents) this is what their recovery is all about – developing that Inner Loving Parent or Functional Adult Self (word coined by Pia Mellody and the Meadows)…. The Functional Adult Self has the ability to affirm rather than criticize the self and to set respectful boundaries. Recovery groups like ACOA are very good at supporting its members in developing the skills needed to do this.
Are you able to affirm yourself and to set boundaries? If not, you may need help developing your Functional Adult Self. I would encourage you to find a support group and/or therapist to help you with this very important task….
For more information about Stephanie, visit www.thetraumaqueen.com or give her a call at 210-287-4002 to schedule an appointment.